Atay Day 4

I had the hives for three days now.

I stopped taking Herbalife.

I drank about two glasses of soft drinks for two days.

Ate a lot of vegetables and juices.

Ate goat meat and two cubes of beef.

Ate fish and mushroom.

Ate a bar of chocolate. 

I had my allergies treated by DRA. DEANNA D. TABAR. I am lucky cause she had a lot of samples and I no longer bought my meds. Shameless plugging her clinic is in the second floor of the St. Elizabeth Building Extension at Santiago Buoulevard. Do visit her. She is a dermatologist. :)

I am afraid of looking at my weight because I am pretty sure nothing has changed.

Now that the hives are already a bit controlled hope I can lose 5 pounds within the next week. :)

ATAY Day 1

Made the commitment a few days back to be one of the alternate liver donor for my niece Brielle.

I went to Ate Mercy to buy Herbalife about three days ago so that I can reach a BMI of 24 in two months from a 34.

Quite difficult, considering that I just suffered a stroke a month ago and I could not do strenuous aerobic exercises.

Started my real diet today. September 28, 2015.

Started my day with fresh lumpia and a slice of quesadilla.

Popped two tablets of Fiber and Herb, one tablet of Vitamins and Minerals, one tablet of synapse, one tablet of clopedogril (have to check the spelling later) and one tablet of garlic.

Drank a mug of Herbalife Green tea.

One shake.

Three capful of Herbal Aloe.

Exercised for fifteen minutes.

Drank an ounce of pure carrot juice.

Pakshet nangangati ako.

Half day done :)

end of entry 12:21 p.m.

Sabbatical

Would it not be nice if my husband will become rich and I can stop working for two years?


Depression sucks!

Alternative Career

I'm contemplating of becoming a recluse.
I'm tired of being strong.
I'm going to be a writer.
I will earn a living as a writer.
I will write legal advice for imaginary clients and those who can relate to the advice can send their donation to my account. Maybe I would not be so stress and I can get pregnant.
One entry done.

Barren

Today, just for today, I refuse to be positive.
Today, I realized that I might never be able to conceive a child of my own and that I would constantly wonder what it would feel to be a biological mother.


I hope this would be similar to my other posts where I was extremely pessimistic the opposite happened.
I was so pessimistic in passing the bar. I passed finally.


I was so pessimistic with marriage. I was married in a flash. I'm still pessimistic with marriage, there are days I curse the fact that I am married and other days that I feel utter bliss.


Now, I'm just pessimistic. I feel that all the dua's that I am making are falling on deaf ears.
and that I am trapped in my difficult, miserable and barren existence.


So for today, just for today, I chose to be negative and pessimistic.


That's it.

Dreams

I found myself Googling "How to live an inspired life." which probably indicates how weird my thought process is right now.

I told my husband that once we are out of the woods from the financial challenge that we are in right now I will be more selective in my cases. Just one case a month.

I would probably still do seminars and accept a teaching load but I would lessen my case load. All in all without the monetary obligations that I am facing now we could operate at about fifty thousand pesos.

I am dreaming of reading and writing more.

Spending my time praying. Living a simple life. 

I can only do this if I will save every penny. 

Inshaa Allah these dreams will happen.

System

I read about building systems instead of setting goals in this article of James Clear and I am experimenting on it. 

I'm thinking that I need to build a system to make me satisfied about my life.

So here is my system:

1. Wake up early 4 am
2. Write down tasks.
3. Read.
4. Blog.
5. Write a page in the Crim 2 book
6. List down expenses.
7. Stick to a budget.
8. Do salah.
9.Exercise for two hours.
10.Read more inspiring articles.
11. Save money.